Tearing Me Apart

As I sit here, wondering where you are
Do I dare to tear myself apart.
Sitting there on the other side
I sat there all night and cried
I waited for you to call
I began to crawl, but I soon started to fall
Falling and falling, deeper I'm going.
Deeper I'm falling in love with you
I never knew I had to pick between you two.
I felt so obligated, how could I choose?
You have no idea what kind of pressure I'm going through.

As life goes on, As do I.
Each night at look at those pretty eyes.
Wondering how someone like you was so perfect.
I feel like a tiny insect.
So many feelings running through my body
And at any instance, all of it can go away.
I enjoy talking to you, you make me feel superior.
I want to get to know you more.
Getting in touch with my inner-feelings, I felt so much more.

My last girlfriend lied, and how much I wanted to cry.
I tried and tried to get back with her, I never really could tell why.
Why she didn't want to.
Was there someone else?
Or is there something wrong with me?
Something wrong with me deep down inside.
I'm sick of running away from my fears.
I'm sick of shedding all of these tears.
So please, leave me be.
As if I wasn’t meant to be.
Because All I want, is you
I think you're beautiful
Don't let anyone tell you different
I don't care about looks, or your body.
Personality means most, I could care less.
I know what you are.
I already like you better than my last girlfriend.
She wasn't involved in this kind of stuff.
Like the stuff we’re into.
She was nothing but a slut.

I just met you, but I feel like I've known you my whole life.
I’ve felt like you were supposed to be in my life.
I don't know you, that much is true.
But what I'm about to tell you, it makes me blue.
I've been an abused child my whole life.
One time I tried to kill myself.
I wanted to live in paradise.
There isn’t anything wrong with me anymore.
Sometimes I want to do it again.
But I don't want to go through the same stuff again.

Not the same crap, not the same lies.
I rather would just have asked to rot out and die.
Die from the misery, as it didn't get my anywhere.
I feel like we are so close.
Yet, we are thousands of miles away.
As I'm sitting here, watching the days go by
Dreaming, what if I was your guy?
Someone who you could tell your problems to
A shoulder for you to cry on when you’re down
Why can't I be that guy who is with you now?
Clearing paths, making you feel safe.
Holding you tight, and watching every step you take.
I hold on, and I've enjoyed the ride.
But mine is coming to a stop
As I have to get off.
So I'll call you tonight
I'll tuck you in at night.
For if I had that chance.
The chance to be with you
Would bring the best out of both me and you
You're talented in so many aspects.
It amazes me; you're my top prospect.
I wish I could ask you the question.
You make me so happy.
And who am I talking about?
Her name is....Kathy.